Traveling Soldier
by samanddianefan10
Summary: Trapper returns home and finds that America isn't quite what he remembered it to be. Louise knows more than what he thinks she does, and how will that affect his family? Life just doesn't turn out how he had planned.
1. Chapter 1

Trapper was home. He couldn't believe it. He never thought he would see America again, let alone Boston. The first thing he did when he stepped off the plane and unto the airport ground was throw himself down and kiss the floor. People looked at him like he was nuts, but he didn't care. When had he ever cared about what people thought about him? It wouldn't be the first crazy thing he did, nor would it be the last. And this was for the best reason of all- it was in the name of freedom. That was the word he had thought about night and day for the longest time, but had begun to think was impossible. War was all he had known for quite some time now, and he had started to think he would never make it back.

Especially after Henry. He had never said it aloud, but his death had shaken him, even more than what he had let on. True, he and Hawkeye had gotten drunk and told some stories and shared some laughs in honor of their lost friend, but Trapper had had nightmares after Henry's death. Even though he didn't always act like it, Trapper did believe in God, and somewhere even he wondered if he was being punished for all of the rotten things he had done in Korea. And there were plenty to choose from.

He liked to think that he was a nice guy- he was quick to lend a hand to his neighbor- most of the time. And he was one heck of a physician. He and Hawkeye had made the best team in Korea, Trapper was sure of it. There was nothing they wouldn't have done to save a patient, even if it looked unorthodox or crazy. He'd risked his reputation many times, but he was proud to be part of a team with a low casualty rate, and in that environment, that was nothing to sneeze at. He was a good friend- he wasn't the heart to heart kind of guy; he never did wear his heart on his sleeve. But he was there for you in a pinch, and Hawkeye had known that he could count on him no matter what.

Hawkeye. What could Trapper say about him? That he was the most swell friend a guy could have? That he wouldn't have made it throughout the war if it weren't for the surgeon from Crabapple Cove? There was no question about that. There were a few times Trapper thought that he might lose his mind, and Hawkeye was right there to pick him up when he needed someone the most. There were only so much homemade swill and a lady of the week could do, and Hawkeye knew that. He was home when home was a million miles away. There would never be any way to repay him for what he had done for Trapper during the war, and in a way, he was grateful that he didn't have to face him to say goodbye. He never was good with the mushy stuff.

And there was Louise. He was coming home a whole new man, and whether or not she would even like him was a question that had bothered him but somehow he had blocked it to the back of his mind during the war. He knew that she had deep suspicions about his flings- she had all but outright asked him several times- and each time he had changed the subject. But whether or not she would confront him was yet to be seen. How would he answer-how could he explain that he, Trapper John, had been a lying, cheating, good for nothing husband who deserved to be handing his walking papers? There was no denying that his wife could do better than him. She could have done better than him in high school. She was one of the popular kids, ready to go to college, when they had a close call and her father forced them to get married. No wonder her father hated him. He would probably hate him too. Having all girls, Trapper would move a thousand miles away if any of them brought home a boy like himself. Knowing his luck, that's how God would punish him for his misadventures during the war, and he would end up in the funny farm. Klinger would be proud.

Finally the bus stopped, just a few blocks from his house, and Trapper remembered the old saying- be careful what you ask for.


	2. Chapter 2

Finally the moment of truth presented itself, as the key turned and he pushed open the door and after what seemed like a small eternity, Trapper was home. This was it. This was everything he'd been living for, and now it didn't seem real. Louise had bought new furniture and hadn't told him, but that was okay. There was _a lot _he hadn't told her. It had the lived in look, even though it was obvious that she took very good care of it. There were plenty of pictures everywhere- Becky and Kathy's newborn pictures, the time where Becky dressed up like her mother and the clothes hung on her quite badly, school pictures, everywhere he looked there were pictures- only one thing was missing. All of the photos of him had been taken down and replaced, and Trapper suddenly felt very sick to his stomach.

"Daddy?"

"Kathy?" he turned around and picked up his daughter, shocked at how tall she was. He almost had a hard time picking her up. "My goodness look how beautiful you are! You look just like your mother! Why, I'm sure the boys are lining up just to marry you. And you know what to do when that happens, right? You come to Daddy, and Daddy will take care of everything, and you won't have to worry about no stinkin' boys for a long time!"

"Put her down, John."

Shocked, Trapper looked up only to see his disapproving wife standing in the hallway entrance with her hands on her hips.

"I'm just saying hi to my daughter. I haven't seen her in God knows how long…"

"Put her down. She's too big to be carried around. And you shouldn't be saying such nonsense to her. She's innocent, and I plan on keeping her that way."

"But I was just.."

"Now, John."

As John looked into Kathy's pleading eyes, he was torn. Part of him wanted to tell Louise what was what, but she did have a point. Kathy wasn't Hawkeye, or even Hot Lips for that matter. He couldn't very well come into their home talking like he was a soldier, when here he was their father and husband, and he knew he had better well act like it. Setting Kathy down, he kissed her forehead and patted her back.

"I'll see you in a little bit sweetheart," he whispered. "Can you go get Becky for me?"

"She's not here, Daddy. She's spending the night at her friend Sheila's house."

"What? Who said she could do that?"

"Mommy said she could."

Trapper stared at Louise, who faux-smiled politely.

"Mommy may I be excused please?"

"Yes, of course. Go on up to your room."

"No, she can't. She's my daughter and I would like to see at least one of my children. Kathy stay here," Trapper insisted.

"Go on, honey. You don't have to listen to this man."

"This man? This man? Do you know who I am?" Trapper heard his voice raising and hated himself but right now he hated Louise even more. He took a deep breath and lowered his voice. "I'm the man who put his butt on the line for you that's who. You don't know what I've been through."

"I would if you would have told me," Louise hissed.

"I didn't tell you because you never asked."

The argument was broken up by the sound of a very unhappy little girl crying, and Trapper ran over to comfort her. As he did, he was pushed away as Kathy ran to her mother. They stood there, looking at him, and he didn't know what to do. A stranger in his own home, he suddenly wished there were a still in his room to make everything okay again. But there wasn't, and there was no Hawkeye, either; all he had was himself, and all he could do was hope that for once that would be good enough to deal with the newest enemy-himself.


	3. Chapter 3

Trapper went out to grab a drink at his local watering hole. In some ways, nothing had changed. There were still the regulars, the girls who were looking for attention, the guys, who, like him, went to escape the hazards of home. He never imagined spending his first night away from home at a place like this, but apparently the bar wasn't the only thing that had changed since he'd been gone.

"Hiya, soldier," a female that he'd went to high school with approached him. "Remember me?" 

"Brenda? I remember you. How the heck are you? You look great. Time's been good to you."

"You sweet talker. Still the same John McIntire that we all knew and loved. Some of them more than others," Brenda grinned. "Can I buy a returning warrior a drink?"

"Who am I to turn you down? I wouldn't want to hurt your feelings. Boy you look great. Nice hair, legs up to here…"

"Now, John, you're married aren't you? I heard you had a passel of kids. Thought that time would have changed you, or at least the war would have."

His eyes narrowed. "Please don't mention the war. I've had enough of it for one lifetime. And the afterlife too if you believe."

"Don't you believe? In God and heaven and all of that?"

"I'll tell you what I believe. I believe I'll take that scotch you promised me," he grinned. He thought about a martini, but he'd had too many of those. Better make it strong, strong enough to forget. By the end of this night he didn't want to remember his own name.

"So, John, what's it like to be back? How are the wife and kids?"

"Do you care?" he smiled.

"Not really." She looked at him closely. He really was a handsome fellow, even if she knew that he would break her heart.

"How about we drink up then head back to your place?"

"What for?" Brenda teased.

"I'd say we have a lot of catching up to do. I haven't seen you in years. And I'm sure it beats this hell hole, no offense barkeep."

"Why wait?"

So before long, Trapper found himself in the very welcoming arms of his high school crush. Thoughts of Louise passed through his mind, but he managed to erase them by distracting himself with a carefully placed kiss. He had had no intention of doing this, but it was Louise's fault. Keeping his kids from him. Nagging him. There was one person whose advice he'd like to have, but he was thousands of miles away in Korea. Maybe he'd give Hawk a call. Better yet, he'd write him a letter. Whatever. Right now he was forgetting his own name, and that was a good thing.

0000

"Where have you been? Do you have any idea what time it is?" Louise challenged as she opened the door, reluctantly.

"Just went out for a drink. Do you mind?"

"For eight hours I do. Maybe you got away with this kind of crap in Korea, but not here."

"Crap? What kind of talk is that? What happened to the lady I married? She'd never use that kind of language."

"Well she wasn't the biggest fool in Boston, was she?"

"Louise, what are you talking about?"

"I know, John."

He stared at her. "What in the world are you talking about? Are you still hiding gin under your pillow? Because I know all about that."

"I know."

He realized that she knew all about Korea- his girls, his lying, his cheating. How she found out, he had no idea, but she knew. This was it. His life was on the line, and for once in his life Trapper found himself speechless.


End file.
